One Year Old

My baby is officially through with his first year. That statement alone is incredible. One year ago I had no idea what to expect. I didn't know who this person was going to be. We didn't even know if this person was to be named Nathaniel or Abigail. Turns out, Nathaniel suited him just fine. There are days where I definitely take him for granted- the days when I just want 10 seconds- no, maybe 5 alone, in my own skin, without someone touching me. Times when I hear his voice in the middle of the night and wish I could roll the other way and he'd miraculously go back to sleep on his own. Thankfully there are more days where I appreciate him. Days where I watch with wonder as he tries out yet another new thing that he has figured out. Times where I am just in awe that mere months ago this same boy couldn't even sit on his own, yet here he is, taking his first steps, pointing at things that he is curious about or wants, staying up way past his bedtime because he can- nursing isn't the miraculous sleep drug it once was.

Speaking of, this also finishes my first year breastfeeding my baby. A strange thing to see written, I'm sure, but amazing nonetheless. It wouldn't be worth mentioning if it wasn't so against the odds. One of the statistics I found was from a survey in 2001. In that, only 13% of moms reported breastfeeding their 12 month old. I'm sure other numbers aren't much higher. When I began on this whole mothering path, it just seemed natural that I would breastfeed- it was most convenient, cheapest, and available. Now that Nathaniel is well on his way into the world of solids and choosing to nurse less frequently, I can begin to see how nursing has evolved from an act of feeding my baby to one of nurturing him and the relationship that we have. I think that act alone is one of the most important things I have done for him this year.

He's one year old. We celebrated, he clapped when we sang Happy Birthday, he smashed his (sugar-free) cupcake all over his face with glee.

I am still so very much in love.

Happy Birthday my sweet boy.